This is the Last One…For Now (Five Limericks)

Limericks are hard. Harder than Sonnets, even.

There once was a girl from St. Lime
Who couldn't get limericks to rhyme
She said "It's all fine
"Till I hit the last line
"And then I just give up."

An old man who lives on Mount Dense
Writes poems that don't make much sense
A bird on the arm
Is a fish in a farm
Squid fiddle, blue Armstrong, one pence.

An activist stood by a tree
He muttered "I'll make change for free"
And then one fine night
A man said, "I'll bite"
"Your change is a buck ninety-three"

A woman known only as "Vowel"
Swore in Chicken, and caused a great howl
"Your words are so crude
"And their usage so rude
"Don't you know that your language is fowl?"

I'd write some more limericks, it's true
But I simply don't know what to do
I'm all out of twists
And I've mucked up my wrist
Writing all of these limericks for you


And now I'm done, and I never have to write another limerick again. Thank God.